So not getting used to which way cars are coming from. Got confused and stepped out and a car whipped around the corner and almost hit me. Good times. Not sure when I'll get used to this.
Things that are just different in weird ways:
- They put yellow lines on the outsides of the roads and white in the center, but white also delineates the driving lanes. So basically there is no real guidance to where the center of the road is.
- Yield triangles are painted on some of the lanes at intersections, but they actually look like pointing arrows...which would make you think that might be the direction cars head in if you aren't used to the whole driving on the left side of the road thing. Sigh.
- Dish soap is washing up soap.
- The exit is labeled "way out" and entrances "way in."
- These examples lead me to believe they are fond of superfluous prepositions. I'll have to keep my eye out for more. :)
- And, all things...haggis? I leave you with haggis crisps (their word for chips):
It has been interesting to be in Scotland for the vote. For the record, I did not stay up all night because they said the results would be in in the morning, and that was correct. I'm not Scottish. I've got nothing invested in the results, so it was rather easy to go to bed. :)
George Square was very festive yesterday. People milling about and excited to vote Yes. Bagpipe music. Today there were still people milling about, some protest songs being played and other debates. It was cordial but much more subdued.
Most of the people I know wanted independence. I have talked with a couple people that wanted to remain part of the UK. Both sides had sound reasons for their decisions. I've heard, and seen a lot of chalk graffiti stating that those who voted no were just sheep or didn't know how to think for themselves. But it's unfair. The no voters I talked to were very thoughtful and felt like either way it was a balance of give and take. Being part of the union is not all negative. They also felt like all politicians lie and promise the moon, but rarely can deliver even if they mean well. They sounded very pragmatic to me.
I have trouble understanding the desire to divide. From the perspective of an American, the idea of dissolving a union just because the politics are different is quite troubling. Even if you want to argue from a cultural standpoint....still, in the US, culturally the northeast has very little in common with the southwest, but somehow we make it work. Sure we bicker a lot... a lot, a lot. :) But a small nation that doesn't export much doesn't seem like the strongest way to go. Although the Yes side says it was not just nationalism at play, it really sounded that way. It got very aggressive.
Still, it was democracy in action. Over 89% of eligible voters turned out. It was 45 to 55% in favor of union. That is pretty clear. Most people were saying it was decided and that was that. Unfortunately some hardcore Yes campaigners are saying it wasn't decisive, naming calling those who chose to stay in the union, and then this evening George Square devolved into two side throwing things at each other. I saw it on the news. I had left before that began. I really hope that the Yes side accepts the democratic process (and stop claiming it somehow wasn't democratic), and can channel their energy into moving the country in the direction that gives more voice to Scotland. So far it sounds a bit like they've thrown their hands up. It's a disappointing reaction, but they need some time to wallow. Hopefully, they adjust. Because it could become a very bitter place. Although the vote was clear (no hanging chads... I'm looking at you Florida!), it was still nearly half the population for and half against.
I leave tomorrow. TOMORROW!! Argh! Breathe. Breathe.
I have been amazed by and am grateful for all the support and positivity being sent my way as I get ready to go. I have been stuffed (so many wonderful invitations to dinner over the last couple weeks. mmmm), caffeinated (delicious, delicious coffee), and treated to some of the most wonderfully thoughtful gifts that I can take along to help me cope with the family separation.
I am almost overwhelmed by the awesome shows of love and support from family and friends alike. I am truly blessed to be a small part of so many people's lives. An event like this brings to light all those connections. I'm just so incredibly blessed! Thank you all so much.
Perhaps it is time for a revival of this blog since there is going to be so much to share as I go to Scotland. It's hard telling how much time I will have for blogging though. I suppose this post is a rumination on how I feel with the anticipation of leaving weighing heavily.
If I want to complete the requirements for my PhD in history, I have to do this study abroad year. We had been led to believe Matt would be able to take sabbatical early and the family would be able to spend at least half the time with me, but that did not work out as planned and they will not be able to come with. They will join me for a month long visit near Christmas though. That will make things a little easier.
I'm grateful for the outpouring of support we are receiving from friends and family. So many people want to see this year go as well and smoothly as possible for us. So many wish me success and give me support for what I am trying to accomplish.
But there is the judgement as well. The "how can you leave your kids for that long?" or the more subtle "it's amazing that you can have the opportunity, but I don't know if I could do it". Little slights about how hard it will be for Matt and the boys, questioning why I can't wait until they are older, and wonderings about how I can put myself before my kids. I guess my first response to all of that is do people really think I haven't agonized over all of that myself? Of course I have.
But here's the deal. I am a person in my own right. I had my own goals and dreams before my kids were born, and I do not believe that those dreams have to be sacrificed for my children. Furthermore, I actually believe that to give up on my dreams sets a poor example for my kids. I think that my boys will see that anyone, at any age, can and should do what they are driven to do. Being a scholar does not negate being a parent nor does being a parent negate my ability to be a scholar. As I told Gabe, not to be immodest, but I'm kind of smart and I just don't feel fulfilled unless I'm using my brain. What being mom gives me is a different kind of fulfillment that I wouldn't trade for anything, but I refuse to believe that being mom (in 2014) means that I have to give up other aspects of my life.
Speaking of 2014, it's sure annoying how un-progressive our thinking truly is. "How will Matt handle the household?" "How can he do all the work of taking care of the boys?" "Children need their mother!" sigh. Matt has always been quite domestic (actually much more so than me). It never occurred to either of us since the beginning of our marriage that household responsibilities would be anything other than divided fairly equally. He does the dishes and the laundry. Always has with few exceptions (I was so bored in South Carolina that dishes and laundry seemed entertaining!). Yes, it will place a greater burden on him for these eight months. But he is fine with that because he supports my need to continue my education. And yes, children do best when they have the support of both their parents, but my being away won't negate that either. I will be part of their lives. They will know my love. The annoying thing is that this wouldn't be viewed in the same way if Matt was leaving for work instead of me. I guess if you ever want to know how far we still have to go towards equality, buck the trend and you'll realize we are nowhere near.
So, I leave in a week. It's hard. There are days that I just can't feel excited about the opportunity because all I can see is how much I am going to miss my family. The activities and programs that I won't be there to witness.
But, kids are adaptable. They will learn through my example that you can do what you set your heart and mind on and accomplish goals, even if it's later in life than you originally thought it would be. They will learn that being a parent does not have to mean surrendering your entire identity to your kids.
Plus, they'll get a pretty kick-a$@ trip to Scotland. :)
I'm guessing no one checks in to this blog anymore, but just in case, I have a funny Malachi story.
Chi was watching a Star Wars The Clone Wars cartoon that he had seen many times. So he grabbed a lightsaber and pretended to act out all the parts.
Then he got a little self-conscious when he saw me watching him, but I assured him he was doing just fine. "Do you like acting?" I asked him.
"Yeah," he replied with a big, goofy grin.
"Well," I said, "you are very good at it. Maybe one day you will grow up to be an actor, like on the TV."
He looked at me quizzically, then peered in to the television and replied, "Yeah, but I don't know how to get in there."
Priceless.
You know, I'm not really sure anyone reads this thing anymore, but I thought I'd write a bit of an update just in case.
Everyone is doing well. Gabe and Chi are both taking gymnastics this fall. Gabe really made some strides this last week. He's never been able to climb the rope and he managed to climb halfway up on Thursday. Halfway is actually very high as the gym is a lofted warehouse type structure. The major difference between boys' and girls' gymnastics is that boys have to spend a lot of time building upper body strength before they can really do many of the apparatus. Chi's class is a preschool class and he's the only one signed up this session. I'm sure he'd like some friends, but it's kind of nice that he gets a private lesson for regular price. He's doing really well and he loves it.
Chi recently faced the reality that only boys have penises. He is aghast. How can I go through life never being able to pee standing up?! But he feels the need to discuss his new found knowledge at length. In public. "I have a penis. Daddy has a penis. Gabe has a penis. But girls don't." Very loudly. I am truly amazed at the number of times he can utter the word penis in a short amount of time (kind of like what I'm doing now. ;) ).
Gabe participated in Adams Art Week at school. He went to an art appreciation workshop on Monday and then they had a program on Friday. We heard about their activities and had student presentations, then got to wander around and check out all the creations. It was nice.
School is going well for both boys. Chi now stays for lunch twice a week so he feels very grown up. He is doing really well with letters and letter sounds and has now read three simple phonics books. Gabe's class is still in the beginning of the year review. They start after Labor Day, but he's getting impatient. This is the first year of standardized testing, so they have been practicing the test as well. Don't even get me started on that. At least he likes his teacher and classmates. But I'm tired of most of his worksheets being works of art. I ask him how he has so much time to draw, and he's says it's all too easy and he always has lots of time left over. So that's a conversation for parent-teacher conferences.
Matt has been busy teaching, but he's enjoying the semester. He's in his tenure review year which is where they decide if he's likely to get it if he applies next year which would be the actual tenure year. It's like getting the green light or a caution before you go up for it and possibly get denied. It's going smoothly and we are not particularly worried.
I am taking a couple classes, working on my thesis and TAing for an American history class. I've been extremely busy this semester, and I'll be relieved when I am done with October, provided I survive it. :)
This recipe has been requested several times and Grandma White suggested I just posted it to the blog and I thought that was a good idea.
Corn and Black Bean Salad
2 cups corn kernels
1 cup diced red bell pepper
1/2 cup thinly sliced green onions
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1 can black beans, 15 oz., rinsed and drained
1/4 cup red wine vinegar
2 teaspoons canola oil (I typically just use extra virgin olive oil)
1 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
Dash of salt
1. Combine first five ingredients.
2. Whisk vinegar with remaining ingredients in a small bowl. Drizzle vinegar mixture over corn mixture and toss well. Cover and chill for 30 minutes.
Eat as a salad, serve with tortilla chips as a dip, or use a relish.
Option: if you want more acid, add the juice of half a lime.
