Undecking the halls

Well, Christmas is over at our house. We have packed everything away. Somehow it always makes the house look really clean to take down stuff. I guess I just don't deal well with clutter for too long. (Which is weird because I am a clutter-y person.) Gabe was fine with the decorations going away, but he's having "Polar Express" withdrawls.

I doubt we will do anything for New Year's. I don't think I have even stayed up the past few years, but Matt and I have been watching all the seasons of "Buffy" again so maybe we'll have a "Buffy" marathon.

Gabe has been loving all his new toys. He cooks many things for us in his kitchen and he keeps borrowing things from around the house to make it more complete. He got a dish towel and he also pulled a book from the bookcase that is his recipe book (it is actually a French language book).

We rearranged his room to make room for the kitchen and also his baby brother.
We decided to have them share a room even though we have 3 bedrooms. This way some of the extra stuff we have still has a home and we are hoping that it will be good for Gabe to have some company in his room. We can always change it if it doesn't work. We have set up the rocking chair and changing table in the spare room so that the bedroom doesn't get too crowded.

Gabe knows that his brother should come after Christmas so now he is getting impatient. He's also throwing fits right and left which leads me to believe that he is nervous. I wouldn't mind the pregnancy being over, but I would still like a couple more weeks. I have been feeling all the signs that the baby is moving down and having some random and irregular contractions, so my body is getting ready. I know all of this could go on for awhile, but I am hoping that it means the baby is going to come a bit early. But I suppose every pregnant woman hopes that at the end of the pregnancy.

Merry Christmas

Well, whether everything is wrapped perfectly, or the dinner menu is perfected, Christmas is coming. I hope everyone takes time to slow down and enjoy the company of family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Aarrgh!

Christmas is 11 days away! 11! I have nothing done. Okay, at least the house is decorated, but that's about it. I still need to decide what food we'll want and go buy it, finish shopping for gifts (really I just have Gabe left, but I can't carry his kitchen myself so Matt has to do it, and I always have Gabe with me when I could pick up the other little things), send the gifts that I have to mail, make cookies because all the ones I already made are gone, and get and send Christmas cards.

That's just the home list. Church is worse, but at least most of the church stuff will be done this Sunday. I have the HS Winter Retreat this weekend starting at 7 pm and going through Sunday morning. This is the one that I do myself, not just taking them somewhere and someone else running the show. Then I have to help with the Christmas program rehearsal (luckily I have little responsibility there), the Christmas program itself is Sunday at 4 pm, but the bigger headache is that the youth group has to serve the soup supper that follows, and (because I'm crazy) we have to set up and run games for the little kids. I noticed the past couple of years that families do the program and just leave, so I had the brilliant idea to have a birthday party for Jesus afterwards. It's a lot of easy stuff, but volunteers have been scarce this year, so it could be a bit strained between getting the supper served and getting the games going.

After that it's a bit easier, but I have to help with the drama for the Christmas Eve service, get my newsletter for January done and write my annual report.

Oh, yeah, and I'm 8 months pregnant with a 3 year old and I'm EXHAUSTED!

When I grow up...

Things will change soon enough. Matt is looking at where we are going when he completes his PhD in July. The short list from his advisers is Cornell, MIT, and Princeton for a post doc position. Obviously Matt has some say in where he goes, but it would be foolish to ignore the advice of his advisers.

All this thinking about Matt will do next, makes me also contemplate what I will do next. My short list is staying home with the kids (at least for a short time, not forever), finding another youth director position, or looking for something in art, preferably teaching related.

I just don't know what to do. I know that every generation who has work in youth ministry has felt ill equipped to handle the next generation of youth, but I definately feel that way. The kids today and the ones coming up need near constant activity, they need to do, not hear. As a person who enjoys activity but LOVES learning, I just don't know if I am well suited to this surface only way of things. That and the lack of parental involvement and concern is so frustrating to me. I do feel like what I do is important, but I often don't feel like the best person for the job.

I also miss art. I was a little tired of teaching when we left Boston, but I would have stayed with it if we had stayed there. It's hard to find art positions. One of my youth group kids is working on a self-portrait for art class and he's been coming to me for advice. It's been really great for me. I have been enjoying that more than my "day job." I think I was good at teaching art.

So if anybody knows what I should be when I grow up, let me know.

Trying to get back on track

I have been so thrown by Thanksgiving. It's been a struggle to get back into the normal way of things, which of course is not helped by the craziness that is December.

So, we are doing fine we are just busy. Matt is having success in the lab. He got some stuff he was waiting for from the machine shop and it works which is good. He said that was the best birthday present he got today. He is also is having success with understanding and interpreting their results.

Gabe is fine. We were finally having success with getting him to go to sleep better. But this week he has been back to his difficult self. I just don't know what to do anymore. We have been trying to keep things really low key before bedtime and I guess this week we haven't done as good of a job with it, so I guess we'll just have to try harder.

On the positive side, he has been so excited about Christmas coming. It's fun to watch. He gets frustrated because he can't remember all the words to "Frosty the Snowman." We try to tell him that nobody remembers all the words to Frosty, but he is determined to sing it all the way through. And it's nice because he's excited about the presents, but that is a very small part of his focus. He's more excited about lights and Christmas trees and stories and the Polar Express and candy canes. All the little things that add up to make this time of year special.

Happy Thanksgiving

This has been a busy week for me. Lots of work stuff including a youth leader retreat on Thursday and Friday. But stuff like that is a nice change, it never really seems like work. But Matt is back so that is nice.

Matt's conference went well. He won the competition and that came with a money prize so that is a nice little boost before the holidays. He also got a job offer, but he doesn't feel it's the best job, so he'll continue to look. No decisions will be made until after the March meeting anyway. So, to answer that question before it's asked, no we don't know where we will be next year.

Gabe hasn't been sleeping well (big surprise). It's been worse than normal. We are trying to calm him down rather than wear him out before bed time now. Our daycare person suggested that. It's definitely not any worse, but not yet showing a huge difference.

Well, we will be headed for Ft. Wayne come Wednesday. I think we are all looking forward to getting away and seeing everyone. And as much as I know it's annoying that all the stores have been pushing Christmas already, I am actually really ready for Christmas (maybe just because it's that much closer to my due date!).

Have a Happy Thanksgiving and safe travels!

Our Little Alligator

Gabe's a funny kid...

Matt is in Florida for a physics conference, in a beautiful hotel overlooking Tampa Bay. Must be nice. Here it is cold and very windy. Gabe, of course, is trying to figure out where Matt is. I tried explaining to him that Florida is a place far away. I compared it to different places he knows to try to get the concept of different places. Just when I think we are getting somewhere, he says, "But we are in November. How can we be in November and Iowa?" Hmm. Good question. How do you explain time to a three year old. I tried many ways, but we didn't get anywhere. When he lost interest, I thanked God, and promptly dropped the matter.

The other weird thing Gabe is doing with Matt gone, is saying he wants Daddy and then running to the front door and knocking on it, as if Matt is just on the other side. I don't know where he got that from. We don't even play a game like that. By the way, it's Tuesday and Matt has only been gone since early Monday morning. I just can't wait to see what else the week will bring. Matt won't be home until Friday night. He gives his talk on Wednesday.

Once I get the computer back (Matt took it with him for his talk) I'll get the photos of Gabe from Halloween uploaded and post one. He was an alligator and I must say, seeing a three year old with an alligator tail swishing as he power walks was hilarious! He was nervous at the start of the the whole trick-or-treating process, but by the third house he realized that all he had to do was be brave enough to go to the door and they gave him candy. Then he was off as fast as his legs could carry him without running.

Jen's Christmas List

So, here's my list, and there is not much I could think of, so sorry for the sparseness.
DVDs:
Keeping the Faith
The Whole Nine Yards
Music and Lyrics
Anne of Green Gables
Any season of Gilmore Girls

Gift certificate for iTunes

Anything related to relaxing and de-stressing. I was thinking maybe gift certificates for prenatal massage, manicure or pedicure. I've never been anywhere, so I don't have a place to give you, but Matt could probably help with this.

food processor
Martha Stewart magazine subscription

And that's all I can come up with. But check out the first Christmas List post again, I added a couple things there.

Merrily we roll along

Well, I am not going to have to worry about gestational diabetes. I had a 3 hour glucose test today. Fasting for twelve hours and then drinking a bunch of sugar is not fun. I felt awful during the first hour, then I improved, but when I was finally able to eat lunch, I got the shakes. I wound up sleeping most of the afternoon. But they said the numbers were looking really good, so all should be fine.

Otherwise, I've had a reasonably quite week. I was with some junior high girls at a retreat all weekend, so I took Monday off. Tuesday and Wednesday were easy days and then I didn't go to work today (though I did do some work) and tomorrow is my regular day off. Of course, there will be a crazy week sometime in the future to make up for the restful week that this has been, but that's all part of being a youth director.

Gabe is well. He's been a bit stuffed up and I wish we could get him over that. It's nothing serious, just not comfortable for him. But he refuses to go to sleep at night so that is not helping him any. I wish he could just be a normal sleeper, but he's as difficult as ever.

He has had a growth spurt, and I am expecting another one due to the way he's eating. He maybe grew a bit taller, but his real growth was mental. He can do simple math now. He told me that he had two ears and if he took one off he would only have one ear. He can also look at some green beans or something and just say how many are there without counting each one out loud. Then, he discovered on his own that blue and red mix together to make purple and went on experimenting to make sure than no other combination also made purple. It is so fun to watch him grow. The ironic thing is that he got the math thing when he was with me, not Matt, and the art thing when he was with Matt, not me.

Matt says his week has been productive. He had to practice his conference talk for his group and they only came up with minor changes, so he will give the talk to a wider audience next week, but otherwise he is ready. The conference is the beginning of November in Tampa. I was tempted to go with, but he's not expecting to have much free time so I don't think it would be that much fun. It's possible he'll go to a conference in Spain this spring, so I think I'll hold on to my vacation time for that.

Does stress ever end?

This has been a hectic week. Matt has been going into the lab almost every night (not to mention for full days) until the wee hours to run experiments. I have had meetings, and evening stuff, plus I leave tonight to take some of the kids to a retreat for the weekend. Wednesday I was on the go all day so I was exhausted.

Gabe went with Matt to work on Monday because Lisa wasn't available that day. He went to a meeting and he's telling everyone that he loves meetings. Of course they took him out for pizza afterwards, so what's not to love?

He's been learning about fire safety at day care lately. He has now learned how to dial 911 and talk to the operator. He practices with a pretend phone. He also knows "stop, drop, and roll." He doesn't like smoke detector noise, but he learned how to get out of the house and where to go at home and at daycare if they have to leave for a fire. He's quite the expert. :)

Out of spite if nothing else

Okay, we all know that chemicals like aspartame are not good for us, but I like to think my diet coke habit isn't a big problem. I was listening to Fresh Air on NPR today and Terri Gross was interviewing a woman who has been studying cancer and the causes of cancer. I don't remember her name, but I gathered that she was pretty important in the field.

She was talking about the problem with cancer research is that it is all focused on finding cures rather than understanding causes. She said that the problem is that most of the groups throwing money at research don't want to know the cause because the finger will probably be pointed at their own products, decisions, etc.

Anyway this woman pointed to aspartame as one of the most dangerous carcinogens. Apparently no one in the scientific community approved of aspartame for food use, but Donald Rumsfeld was a part of some committee that gave the go ahead. Now, I don't know about you, but I don't find Donald Rumsfeld to be a trustworthy person or a person that does anything for the greater good. He's seems to only ever be motivated by personal gain. So I've been polluting my body with a product that Rummy made possible.

So, I know I need to quit drinking it. Before hearing any of this I already have been trying to cut back, but now I am motivated by my immense dislike of Rumsfeld to stop drinking diet coke. It's hard though because I love all of it, the fizz, the flavor (all other pop is too sweet!), and the caffeine in a cold beverage. I also love that when I drink it, I don't feel so hungry. Nothing else compares. But I have to be strong...

Christmas Lists and Such

All right. For Matt's side of the the family, Christmas will happen at Thanksgiving so that is why I am doing this so early. I hope that you don't feel obligated to get us stuff. I am only doing this here because it's convenient for me.

Several have asked what we need for the new baby. Truthfully, not much, but here's a list of what I could come up with:
Ellaroo Ring Sling (this is a sling carrier that I saw a woman with and thought, I like that, I have only seen it online at Babies R Us)
Mother's Touch Bather or similar (this is a baby "bath" that instead of being a little bathtub, it looks more like a bouncy chair that you can put into the regular bath. I know I've seen other brands, but that's the only one I could think of)
Bobby Pillow
Cloth Diapers (to use as burp clothes)
Some winter clothes

For Gabe, as tempting as the large toys are, please don't buy anything that can't be broken down for storage! We are going to buy him one large toy this year, the Play Wonder Kitchen from Target.
To go with the kitchen:
bakeware set
cookware set
apron and chef hat
(he does have play food, but it's okay you wanted to buy something like that)
microphone (there are several, ones that are attached to a music player, etc. we would prefer one where the mic worked on it's own so he can either sing with music or tell knock-knock jokes)
Shake n' Go cars
Geotrax
He still likes Thomas but he has so much of that now, I wouldn't know what to tell you to get, but he does love a tee shirt that he will soon out grow because it is really an oversized 2T, so maybe some Thomas clothes. He's still a 3T.
Jungle Book DVD
Charlie Brown Christmas DVD
Frosty the Snowman DVD
art storage box, these are only a couple inches tall and usually 11x17 or larger and designed to hold several drawings, etc. They sell them at art stores and Pottery Barn. (Believe it or not, I can handle get rid of some of it, but Gabe wants to keep everything, so we need storage.)

Matt wants a Segway. (I put this on here because he told me to have Gabe ask for one. These only cost $3,000, so don't even go looking, but feel free to give him a hard time.)

As for Matt and I, the stuff for the baby would make us perfectly happy. I haven't really given it much thought.
Matt would like the following DVDs:
Buffy, season 7
Spiderman 2
Harry Potter 5 (if it's out)
There are physics books I know he wants but a Borders or Barnes and Noble gift card is really the easiest way to go on that. If you want titles, let us know and I'll pin him down on that.
He could use new jeans 32 x 32 he prefers straight legs, and NOT the broken in look, his Old Navy ones have been favorites.
plain front cords, neutral color such as khaki, brown, grey, blue
tee shirts, M, just stuff he can wear to the lab, he's happy with plain colors.

I've been so worried about what the boys want or need that I haven't even given my list a thought. I'll have to get back to you on that.

Hmm...

So, I am sorry that I haven't posted in more than a week. I've been a little blue lately, and didn't feel like writing about that, but I don't want to get in the habit of not writing.

I don't really know what's up with me. I know post-partum depression is common, but how about "partum" depression? I don't feel depressed exactly, and there is a lot of stress and frustration at work, but I feel disproportionately down.

Gabe is fun. He can spell mommy and he's working on daddy. He can recognize quite a few words and he wants to learn to read. I think I am going to make labels like "wall" and "door" and post them on the thing around the house. That way he can associate them and later I'll take them down and see if he can recognize the word. I think phonics are very important and we are working on letter sounds, but I think kids build early vocabulary by recognizing whole words. I am in both camps so we'll approach it both ways.

Matt is frustrated because he just can't get things done in the lab and he's up against a deadline for his conference in November. But he's done well with a paper that they submitted. He has a couple adjustments to make and then it will be accepted.

So that's where we are right now.

TGIF

This week has been incredibly long. Several people think I should be a pastor, but a week like this makes me feel like there is no possible way. I just take too much to heart and can't let it roll off my back. I felt more or less attacked at church council this week. Really, what it amounted to is that to make a point several people thought making me look bad was the easiest way to do it. I know I should let it go and move on, but I am very troubled by their attitudes and behavior. Not only because I wound up looking bad, but because two of the three were people that I thought were supportive of me and the ministry. It's difficult to want to even go to work when stuff like this going on.

Our babysitter has been out of town since Wednesday as well because her son is graduating from basic training. So Matt has had to stay home the most, but we've been bouncing Gabe around between us and friends. Today is all right though since I normally stay home with Gabe on Fridays.

We went to the library this morning because he wanted story time with songs. Our regular story time has lots of action songs and rhymes. Gabe's face just lights up the whole time.

I think Gabe is more excited now that he knows he is going to have baby brother. He talks about "his baby" more. I think he really got it when I sat him down and told him that they used a special camera to take pictures of the baby who is still in mommy's tummy. There is one picture where you can really tell the baby is sucking his thumb. Gabe just loves it. I think that picture made it real for him.

Matt is good. He has been happy with the way things are going in the lab. He gave a talk to his group last Monday and it went well. He also taught a class for a professor that was out of town. It was a graduate level course and he was nervous about knowing it all well enough to explain it, but it went well. In November he goes to Tampa for a conference and he is already a finalist so he has won a fellowship which has a small money prize and the presentations will be judged and he could win a larger fellowship.

It's a Boy

I had my ultrasound today and it is a boy. He was camera shy just like Gabe. He kept turning his head when the technician tried to get pictures of his face. But she saw all the important stuff to determine that he is healthy and growing at the right rate. I am 20 weeks, so halfway there. Yea, me.

Everyone is okay

I think everyone is healthy now, or at least close enough. Last night I thought it was my turn to get sick, but I think I was just overly exhausted. I fell asleep at 3 pm and just couldn't wake up until after 7 pm. Unfortunately that meant I missed a picnic some people from Matt's lab were having. I was bummed out, but I know I have to take care of myself right now.

Matt and Gabe had a good time at the park with everyone though. I woke up in time to see Gabe a bit before he went to bed. And I was up to see "Psych." Have you watched this show? It's on USA on Fridays at 9 pm central. It is one of the most entertaining shows out there right now. I highly recommend it. I don't think I have looked forward to a Friday night tv show since I was a kid, but I love this one.

Tomorrow will be busy. It's Rally Day at church so Sunday school is kicking off. We are having an old fashioned picnic in the park and we are arriving at the park by horse drawn wagons. Should be fun. Matt is teaching the preschool class for the first half of the year. I know he'll do a good job, but I sort of wish some one else was teaching Gabe. I will teach high school as usual.

The baby has been moving a lot. Seems to really love dark chocolate. Well, either that or it's just such a sugar rush that he can't help bouncing all over the place, but every time I have dark chocolate it's like a mini tap dance in my belly. You can't feel him move from the outside yet though, but he's getting bigger because I feel the movements more and more each day. Oh, I know I keep saying he, but that is just a better neutral pronoun for a person than it. We won't know until Friday whether it's a boy or a girl.

Weird Week

Well, Gabe still isn't quite over his sickness and nights are still rough, but Matt did get sick. He even stayed home from work two days, which is amazing for Matt. And Matt is doing much better; I'm so glad too because I'm starting to get exhausted.

Things are gearing up at work. Finally we seem to be getting the confirmation kids to bond. I think this year's group might actually put some effort into class and if nothing else, be happy to be there since they get to see each other. I am doing my best to make the church a kid-friendly place, but there is a lot of apathy to overcome. In any case, I feel good this week about our progress.

Days of Labor

Ah, the joys of holiday weekends, which means time to do extra chores. I'm not really complaining though because I am happy to have had the time and motivation to get stuff done. We cleaned the carpet in the living room and dining room. Rentals all come with this nice light beige carpet which shows everything. We have lived here a year and have already cleaned carpets twice and I know I'll need to clean them at least one more time before the baby is born. I am so having all hard wood when I have my own house!

I've also spent some time cleaning up the den. Stuff just piles up in there since we don't often use it. I am putting the rocking chair in there though. The baby will share a room with Gabe though. His room is more than large enough and I hope it will just be easier that way.

Gabe has been sick. Just some mild bug. He's doing better now that he taking some medicine, but nights have been a bit rough. Consequently, Matt and I are a bit tired ourselves. Actually, I think Matt is getting sick, but he's still in the denial phase. I really hope I don't get it too.

here, fishy, fishy

We finally got tired of looking at our empty fish tank and went out to replace Clark the Goldfish. We actually wound up getting two tiny rosies and one small goldfish. I asked Gabe what their names were going to be and he said, "Clark, another Clark, and another Clark." Matt suggested Oliver Boliver Butt from Dr. Seuss's story "Too Many Daves," but thankfully Gabe thought that was just silly. Though I must admit a tiny fish with three names is very funny.

You have to understand that to Gabe all fish are named Clark. I have no idea why Clark, but I love it. I think their names are truly Clark, Another Clark and Another Clark. I'm not sure which one is which though.

Oh, and he wasn't tired at all tonight, but he fell asleep on our seven minute ride home from the store.

Don't Say I Never Told You...

Okay, so I know I am terrible about keeping all those I know and love up to date. For instance, sorry to all those I still haven't told about my pregnancy. Yea! Matt and are going to have child number 2, due Jan. 28. So now you know.

Gabe is doing fine. Yesterday we spent the day at a park that had a lake and paddle boats and such. Gabe really, really wanted to go out on the boat so we rented a boat; luckily it was only $3/half hour because after 15 minutes he just wanted to go back to the beach and go swimming. Ah, the attention span of a three year old. But overall it was nice. We had a picnic and played catch. Gabe is exhibiting no talent whatsoever for baseball, but that's fine with me.

Matt and I have both been stressed out lately (maybe that's why Gabe's been so whinny -- I don't know). Matt is having trouble with thermometers that don't agree so they have to fix things so that the data they are publishing is correct. Plus this is Matt's last year; he is tentatively scheduled to defend his dissertation next July, so I think he will be in a perpetual state of stress.

I am stressed because the church is having money issues (what church doesn't) so I am a bit worried that at some point there just won't be money left for my paycheck, but most people have told me not too worry. There is just one really doom and gloom person right now, so maybe it will be okay. It's hard not to stress out though.

Otherwise, not much is going on. We went dresser shopping today. Have you done that recently? Do you know how much they want for those?! It's crazy. They want $200 for cheap ones at places like Kmart and Target. I'll spare you what they want for nice ones, but I'll tell you that we would be required to sell our unborn child to afford one. It's days like this that make me hate HGTV and Trading Spaces and all the shows that made everyone a decorator. As much as I like watching the shows, all it really accomplished was making all things related to home decor more expensive. Oh, well, what are you going to do? I guess buy a cheap dresser and hope it lasts more than a year.